This is one of my favorite poems ever:
This Is Just to Say
I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast.
Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold.
--William Carlos Williams
It's the most un-apologetic apology and that's the beauty of it (for me, anyway). An ex-coworker emailed me variations upon it. Apparently not everyone is as fond of the poem as I am. Here are the variations:
I
I chopped down
the house
that you had
been saving
to live in
next summer.
I am sorry
it was morning
I had nothing to do
its wooden beams
were so inviting.
II
We laughed
at the hollyhocks
together
then sprayed them
with lye.
Forgive me
I simply do
not know
what I'm doing.
III
I gave away
the money
that you had
been saving to live
on for the next ten years.
The man
who asked
for it
was shabby
Forgive me
the firm March
wind on the porch
was so juicy
so cold.
As much as I love the poem, these made me laugh. Any apologies written to me like this would have to be forgiven for their shear creativity.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Thursday, February 17, 2005
13
My little (or not-so-little) nieces have turned 13. They've entered the exciting world known as the "teens". And I'm hit with feelings of nostalgia & old age. 13 yrs ago, I was merely a college student, trying to figure out my life.
13 yrs ago, I held both of them in my arms at the same time--one in each arm. I heard them wake up, one at a time in the middle of the night. And on their 1st birthday, I saw them sitting on the gift table at their party, looking very much like the gifts they were to us all.
10 yrs ago, I landed a job at a pharmaceutical company, took a semester off and worked full-time.
10 yrs ago, we went to the Children's Museum where they stood straight up inside a tunnel, painted their faces and pretended to be kings.
8 yrs ago, I finally graduated from college, had a fabulous celebration, made a job change, moved out of my parents' home and in with my sister & the girls.
8 yrs ago, the girls were scared by my voice loss on graduation day (I had celebrated the night before) and I heard Shazia singing (when she didn't think anyone was listening) Rolling Stones "you can't always get what you want but if you try sometimes you'll get what you need."
6 yrs ago, I made yet another job change and survived my first real broken heart.
6 yrs ago, the girls started playing soccer, or I should say standing on the soccer field, and I started dropping them off to school in the mornings with a kiss.
4 yrs ago, I moved out of my sister's and into the city into my very own place and missed driving the girls to school and having their chitter-chatter wake me on weekend mornings.
4 yrs ago, the girls helped move me into my new place, explore my new neighborhood, helped me explore my new neighborhood and walked down the aisle as beautiful flower girls at their mom's wedding.
3 yrs ago, they spent a weekend at my place & we went to see the Blue Man Group for their birthday.
2 yrs ago, they started joking they'd soon be taller than me.
1 yr ago, they were as tall as me, and they became sisters to a new baby girl.
Which of course brings us to the present with two beautiful girls starting their teens. And that's it for my walk down memory lane.
13 yrs ago, I held both of them in my arms at the same time--one in each arm. I heard them wake up, one at a time in the middle of the night. And on their 1st birthday, I saw them sitting on the gift table at their party, looking very much like the gifts they were to us all.
10 yrs ago, I landed a job at a pharmaceutical company, took a semester off and worked full-time.
10 yrs ago, we went to the Children's Museum where they stood straight up inside a tunnel, painted their faces and pretended to be kings.
8 yrs ago, I finally graduated from college, had a fabulous celebration, made a job change, moved out of my parents' home and in with my sister & the girls.
8 yrs ago, the girls were scared by my voice loss on graduation day (I had celebrated the night before) and I heard Shazia singing (when she didn't think anyone was listening) Rolling Stones "you can't always get what you want but if you try sometimes you'll get what you need."
6 yrs ago, I made yet another job change and survived my first real broken heart.
6 yrs ago, the girls started playing soccer, or I should say standing on the soccer field, and I started dropping them off to school in the mornings with a kiss.
4 yrs ago, I moved out of my sister's and into the city into my very own place and missed driving the girls to school and having their chitter-chatter wake me on weekend mornings.
4 yrs ago, the girls helped move me into my new place, explore my new neighborhood, helped me explore my new neighborhood and walked down the aisle as beautiful flower girls at their mom's wedding.
3 yrs ago, they spent a weekend at my place & we went to see the Blue Man Group for their birthday.
2 yrs ago, they started joking they'd soon be taller than me.
1 yr ago, they were as tall as me, and they became sisters to a new baby girl.
Which of course brings us to the present with two beautiful girls starting their teens. And that's it for my walk down memory lane.
Monday, February 07, 2005
he's just not that into you
Of course we all remember the episode when Miranda learned that the guy of the moment just wasn't that into her. And how liberated she felt. Well, here's the book that's meant to liberate all single women by giving them the power of knowledge. And, here's the knowledge I've gained:
Here's what else the book got me thinkin' about--why leave the guys out in the cold? Why not also give them the power of knowledge. Aren't they always complaining about not knowing what women want? How about someone out there write a book "she's just not that into you if..." I'll help them out with a couple of pointers:
she's just not that into you if:
- if he doesn't call, he's just not that into you (as the writer says: "With the advent of cell phones and speed dialing, it is almost impossible not to call you...If I were into you, you would be the bright spot in my horribly busy day. Which would be a day that I would never be too busy to call you.") In my opinion, the same rule applies to email.
- if he's sleeping with someone else, he's just not that into you
- if he's not asking you out, he's just not that into you
- if he's breaking up with you, he's just not that into you
- if he's married to someone else, he's just not that into you
- if he's a selfish jerk, a bully or a big freak, he's just not that into you
- if you don't know if you're dating him, he's just not that into you (apparently when a guy's really into you and wants to date you, he'll let you know!! Imagine that!)
Can I (from my own & from friends' experiences) also add:
- if he only talks about himself, he's just not that into you
- if he only calls you at 1:00 a.m. on a Saturday night, he's just not that into you (and he's only calling for one reason, do not let him come over!!!)
- if he's only returning your phone calls, he's just not that into you
- if he's jacking-off on your bed on the 2nd date, he's just not that into you (ok, ok, ok, i'll let that one go...eventually!!!)
- if he's not making New Year's plans with you, he's just not that into you
- if he doesn't want to be exclusive, he's just not that into you
- if you're confused about what's going on with you two, he's just not that into you
Here's what else the book got me thinkin' about--why leave the guys out in the cold? Why not also give them the power of knowledge. Aren't they always complaining about not knowing what women want? How about someone out there write a book "she's just not that into you if..." I'll help them out with a couple of pointers:
she's just not that into you if:
- washing her hair on a date night is more important than seeing you (ok I've never actually known anyone to use this excuse, but just in case and really I don't know any women who spend a whole evening doing this)
- she's not returning your phone calls (i.e. take a hint and don't keep calling. That automatically puts you in the freak category.)
- she's too busy (see above from "he's not that into you")
- she's only seeking you out when she has car problems, other guy problems, plumbing problems, etc...
Thursday, January 27, 2005
The Joy of Working in Retail
For as long as I can remember, I've had a part-time job in the retail world in addition to whatever full-time job I've had. I've blessed Crabtree & Evelyn, Bombay Co (tried to introduce bhangra music to them--it didn't go over too well), J Crew and now Crate & Barrel with my presence. Tonight, I've finally come to known why I love the retail world so much. It's a little thing called schtikel at C&B. What's this, you ask? It's a shelf that has merchandise that is slightly damaged (a little chip here, a little scratch there), has been returned & cannot be resold for whatever reason, floor displays that have nothing wrong with them, out-of-season items and we, the very lucky employees of C&B, get to buy these items for next to nothing. Tonight $7.50 got me a serving platter, some very cute, colorful nesting bowls, and the grande finale an entire set of new bedding. I'm talkin' about a duvet cover, a fitted sheet, a flat sheet, and 2 pillow shams. Yes, indeed, you did read that right. I couldn't word it better than one of my coworkers: "Whenever I feel sad & I have to come to work, I just know schtikel will make it all better." The joy of schtikel...
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
How Soon Is Too Soon & What Kind of Girl Am I?
I got a call on my drive to work this morning.
“Arsh? I slept with him too soon,” my friend blurted out.
“Who?”
“____ the guy I went on a 3rd date with.”
I felt almost Carrie Bradshaw-like, getting this information first thing in the morning from someone I don’t talk to regularly.
“Why do you think it’s too soon? Weren’t you ready?”
“I was, but I don’t want him to think I’m one of those girls he’s just having fun with & sleeps around too soon and can’t marry.”
What’s this? Do guys really think of some women as “fun” and some as “marriageable”? Indeed. I’m immediately taken back to a different conversation w/a guy who was stating just that. There are two kinds of girls—the kind you have fun with and the kind you marry. And, apparently women do also. None that I know of personally, but this guy went on to tell me that indeed women have their boy-toys and the men they marry. It doesn’t sound so far-fetched—didn’t the long-haired boy start off as Samantha’s (Sex & the City) boy-toy? But back to the problem at hand.
“If you both felt comfortable, I’m sure it’s fine.” I’m not used to early morning conversations of such nature so I was eager to get off the phone.
“You don’t think it was too soon then?”
“Like I said, it really depends on your comfort level. Maybe talk to him about it to see where he’s at if you’re worried.”
Then came the inevitable question.
“Have you ever slept with someone this soon?”“Oh, you know what, I’m pulling into work so I better go.” That was a close call. But nevertheless, I was left pondering how soon is too soon? And what kind of girl am I—the marrying kind or the having fun kind? Maybe I should do a survey of ex’s…or NOT.
“Arsh? I slept with him too soon,” my friend blurted out.
“Who?”
“____ the guy I went on a 3rd date with.”
I felt almost Carrie Bradshaw-like, getting this information first thing in the morning from someone I don’t talk to regularly.
“Why do you think it’s too soon? Weren’t you ready?”
“I was, but I don’t want him to think I’m one of those girls he’s just having fun with & sleeps around too soon and can’t marry.”
What’s this? Do guys really think of some women as “fun” and some as “marriageable”? Indeed. I’m immediately taken back to a different conversation w/a guy who was stating just that. There are two kinds of girls—the kind you have fun with and the kind you marry. And, apparently women do also. None that I know of personally, but this guy went on to tell me that indeed women have their boy-toys and the men they marry. It doesn’t sound so far-fetched—didn’t the long-haired boy start off as Samantha’s (Sex & the City) boy-toy? But back to the problem at hand.
“If you both felt comfortable, I’m sure it’s fine.” I’m not used to early morning conversations of such nature so I was eager to get off the phone.
“You don’t think it was too soon then?”
“Like I said, it really depends on your comfort level. Maybe talk to him about it to see where he’s at if you’re worried.”
Then came the inevitable question.
“Have you ever slept with someone this soon?”“Oh, you know what, I’m pulling into work so I better go.” That was a close call. But nevertheless, I was left pondering how soon is too soon? And what kind of girl am I—the marrying kind or the having fun kind? Maybe I should do a survey of ex’s…or NOT.
Friday, January 21, 2005
Virutal Dating Part Two
This year I decided to start the year off on a clean slate--no more virutal dating, no more "searching" for the right one...it will happen when it happens. Or so they say. For now I am living and enjoying life. There are one or two possible interests on the horizon but for now they are friends and either they will remain that way or not, that's yet to be seen. That's besides the point. The point here is while I haven't been actively doing the online dating thing, I still have accounts that remain inactive on a couple of sites. Because of that I sometimes get responses to my profiles. Even if the inquiries sound good I don't usually respond because meeting people this way just does not appeal to me anymore. What gets me are some of the emails I have received from people expressing an interest. Now, when I came across a profile I was interested in, I did my best to put my best foot forward, even if it is through email. Here are just a couple of emails I have received that amazed me. They left me wondering if these people really care about the first impression they're making. Go ahead and call me a jerk (or whatever harsh word you choose to use) but why don't people care about grammar anymore? I don't care if it's only email--unless I know you personally, grammar matters!!! Would you have responded to these?
I am really amazed by reading your profile. It was treaded in an hillarious manner. Well, after reading I thought why not I mail you. So, here is the mail... I am also 32 and looking for a woman to date and have relationship. If you get a chance, read my profile and reply me back if you are open.
I am 40 years old medical doctor and farm business owner from Pakistan (not in UK mentioned in profile.. sorry). Would you be interested in marriage with someone of a different country or culture as I am? I am not rushing to marriage straight away but that's what I aim for. If yes, we can explore more. I am simple, honest, very flexible, understanding and caring person. I know how to treat and appreciate my lady with care and respect and can treat her queen or princess. I won't impose any restrictions but would needs total loyalty and faithfulness in return. Religion of partner is not important to me but I am Muslim by birth (not much religious though).If relationship doesn't works, we can be true friends forever at least. Do get in touch if willing to explore more.
Hello: There How are you? I hope you are fine. I read you ad very well and I believe we will be the best match. If you show interests to me and are willing to know more about me, please let me know. WE have mutual communication by email and later you will find that I am a very nice man too. And I maybe I'm the one you are looking for. I hope to be close to you with my kind and sincere. I do feel you are very excellent. I am very lucky to have met you among the mess on net. I will cherish the precious relationship. My name is Mohammed born in Alexandria, Egypt grow up to age 20 then I move to Germany and I have been living in Charlotte, NC. USA from 1983. I am successful and financially secure with a love of living life to its fullest. I love dining out and I LIKE All music, I love to Travel, Swimming, Cooking, Playing sports, horseback ridding, bike rides, jump rope, Driving sports car convertible in the sunset, walking on the beach, playing in the sand with my kids. I have two beautiful kids who are the light of my life. I do hope we can know each other more with our communicate. I'm young man with a lot to offer that special women. I am successful and financially secure with a love of living life to its fullest I would like to share my life with a women who knows who she is and what she wants, a women with plans who can also be spontaneous. I have two beautiful kids who are live full time with me...but I also realize that it's important to share yourself with a special someone. Whoever comes into my life will get a person who views the glass as half full NEVER half empty, a caring, warm, big hearted guy. MANY THANKS FOR YOUR RESPOND. would describe myself as honest, caring, intelligent (but not a stuffy intellectual), goofy, and fun. I enjoy spending time with my friends and family, and value those relationships tremendously. I have a great sense of humor and I am basically a happy person. I would like very much to have someone special in my life. I am an easy going person that is loyal and trustworthy, affectionate and sensitive, who values family and friends and live a healthy lifestyle. I have a deep desire to worship and please GOD. I believe. that a woman should be treated with respect and showered with love. She always be the center of my love. I am looking for a durable, stable relationship, someone not afraid to communicate what's on their mind, especially if it affects our relationship. A good sense of humor and a positive outlook are essential. I love the ocean and the beach, and am willing to go shark diving once! I like singing really loud in my car and deluding myself that nobody can see me doing it. I listen to a wide variety of music and I would have a very difficult time choosing an all time favorite song. Love to travel to exotic places and explore the culture. I am professionally employed and basically happy with my life, but I am looking for a quality person to share it with. I find that most anything can be interesting or fun if you are with the right person. If you're looking for a best friend AND your future better half then I'm looking forward to talking to you. HERE SOME QUESTION AND I LIKE YOU TO ANSWER THE SAME QUESTION I'M ALREADY ANSWERING THEM. How old are you? I am 45 years old. How old are your kids? My kids they are very young. Mohammed is 9 years old and jasmine is 7 years old. 2- Where is their mother? there mother is American. About what happen with my ex wife she cheat on me with others. 3- What do you do in life and what kind of education do you have? I own business for 12 years. my Education mechanic Engineer specialist in motor craft. 4- Are you serious? I'm very serious no time for games I have kids need love not jocks, I'm also looking for lady to be nice, polite, lovely, friendly, and sweet. I AM SICK LADY ALL IN ONE WOMEN PASSIONATE LOVER, CARING FRIEND CULTURALLY DIVERSIFIED CONVERSATIONALIST OPEN MINDED, KINDHEARTED COMPANION ACTIVE GLOBE-TROTTER, TRUE LIVE LOVER/POSITIVE THINKER. PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE, CUTE / EDUCATED AFFECTIONATE, INTELLIGENT, PATIENT, LOVING FOR CHILDREN VERY MUCH, ACTIVE, ORGANIZED a God fearing partner life. Respectable, Dependable. Mature, stable emotionally at least. A women who is ready to settle down. A women who enjoys life yet not very impressed with material stuff in life. A women who is willing to be the DEVOTED WIFE. Thank you for READING MY EMAIL. Any other question you may like to ask please ask me on the phone I do not like to give to much detail on the net. I would love to see your pictures if you do not mind. have a nice day. I'm not a member on here-so please SEND ME YOUR RESPOND TO MY EMAIL
I am really amazed by reading your profile. It was treaded in an hillarious manner. Well, after reading I thought why not I mail you. So, here is the mail... I am also 32 and looking for a woman to date and have relationship. If you get a chance, read my profile and reply me back if you are open.
I am 40 years old medical doctor and farm business owner from Pakistan (not in UK mentioned in profile.. sorry). Would you be interested in marriage with someone of a different country or culture as I am? I am not rushing to marriage straight away but that's what I aim for. If yes, we can explore more. I am simple, honest, very flexible, understanding and caring person. I know how to treat and appreciate my lady with care and respect and can treat her queen or princess. I won't impose any restrictions but would needs total loyalty and faithfulness in return. Religion of partner is not important to me but I am Muslim by birth (not much religious though).If relationship doesn't works, we can be true friends forever at least. Do get in touch if willing to explore more.
Hello: There How are you? I hope you are fine. I read you ad very well and I believe we will be the best match. If you show interests to me and are willing to know more about me, please let me know. WE have mutual communication by email and later you will find that I am a very nice man too. And I maybe I'm the one you are looking for. I hope to be close to you with my kind and sincere. I do feel you are very excellent. I am very lucky to have met you among the mess on net. I will cherish the precious relationship. My name is Mohammed born in Alexandria, Egypt grow up to age 20 then I move to Germany and I have been living in Charlotte, NC. USA from 1983. I am successful and financially secure with a love of living life to its fullest. I love dining out and I LIKE All music, I love to Travel, Swimming, Cooking, Playing sports, horseback ridding, bike rides, jump rope, Driving sports car convertible in the sunset, walking on the beach, playing in the sand with my kids. I have two beautiful kids who are the light of my life. I do hope we can know each other more with our communicate. I'm young man with a lot to offer that special women. I am successful and financially secure with a love of living life to its fullest I would like to share my life with a women who knows who she is and what she wants, a women with plans who can also be spontaneous. I have two beautiful kids who are live full time with me...but I also realize that it's important to share yourself with a special someone. Whoever comes into my life will get a person who views the glass as half full NEVER half empty, a caring, warm, big hearted guy. MANY THANKS FOR YOUR RESPOND. would describe myself as honest, caring, intelligent (but not a stuffy intellectual), goofy, and fun. I enjoy spending time with my friends and family, and value those relationships tremendously. I have a great sense of humor and I am basically a happy person. I would like very much to have someone special in my life. I am an easy going person that is loyal and trustworthy, affectionate and sensitive, who values family and friends and live a healthy lifestyle. I have a deep desire to worship and please GOD. I believe. that a woman should be treated with respect and showered with love. She always be the center of my love. I am looking for a durable, stable relationship, someone not afraid to communicate what's on their mind, especially if it affects our relationship. A good sense of humor and a positive outlook are essential. I love the ocean and the beach, and am willing to go shark diving once! I like singing really loud in my car and deluding myself that nobody can see me doing it. I listen to a wide variety of music and I would have a very difficult time choosing an all time favorite song. Love to travel to exotic places and explore the culture. I am professionally employed and basically happy with my life, but I am looking for a quality person to share it with. I find that most anything can be interesting or fun if you are with the right person. If you're looking for a best friend AND your future better half then I'm looking forward to talking to you. HERE SOME QUESTION AND I LIKE YOU TO ANSWER THE SAME QUESTION I'M ALREADY ANSWERING THEM. How old are you? I am 45 years old. How old are your kids? My kids they are very young. Mohammed is 9 years old and jasmine is 7 years old. 2- Where is their mother? there mother is American. About what happen with my ex wife she cheat on me with others. 3- What do you do in life and what kind of education do you have? I own business for 12 years. my Education mechanic Engineer specialist in motor craft. 4- Are you serious? I'm very serious no time for games I have kids need love not jocks, I'm also looking for lady to be nice, polite, lovely, friendly, and sweet. I AM SICK LADY ALL IN ONE WOMEN PASSIONATE LOVER, CARING FRIEND CULTURALLY DIVERSIFIED CONVERSATIONALIST OPEN MINDED, KINDHEARTED COMPANION ACTIVE GLOBE-TROTTER, TRUE LIVE LOVER/POSITIVE THINKER. PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE, CUTE / EDUCATED AFFECTIONATE, INTELLIGENT, PATIENT, LOVING FOR CHILDREN VERY MUCH, ACTIVE, ORGANIZED a God fearing partner life. Respectable, Dependable. Mature, stable emotionally at least. A women who is ready to settle down. A women who enjoys life yet not very impressed with material stuff in life. A women who is willing to be the DEVOTED WIFE. Thank you for READING MY EMAIL. Any other question you may like to ask please ask me on the phone I do not like to give to much detail on the net. I would love to see your pictures if you do not mind. have a nice day. I'm not a member on here-so please SEND ME YOUR RESPOND TO MY EMAIL
Reading List
I was in a book club last year--well, really, just the first half of the year. We picked a few decent books to read--like the Red Tent, the Kite Runner--okay, so it was just a couple. I may have read another good one through them but I can't recall. But most of the selections were annoying. How can a book be annoying you ask? Well, the plots were predictable and the characters just weren't intriguing enough, or I was turned off by the title so I didn't bother with the book. I know, I know, you're not supposed to judge a book by it's cover, but if I don't even find the title interesting, why should I bother with the rest of the book? Anyway, recently a friend brought a book back for me from another country. And shortly thereafter another friend asked me what I thought of the book so far. The following words slipped out: Well, it's just not that well written. In response my friend said, okay you've got to stop being so critical--what do you think of the story? And on went our conversation.
But, it got me thinking. Am I being too critical? What is it exactly that makes me say "It's just not that well written." I am not by any means a great writer myself so what expertise am I basing this criticism on? Does a book have to be well written for it to be enjoyable? I know many people who read romance novels just for the hell of it--and I don't know that either of the above-mentioned books are particularly "well-written" but they tell great stories. So, is reading anything a good thing or just reading quality books? Well, contrary to popular belief, I don't have all the answers.
However, one of my new year's resolutions was to read some of the classics. The one that I've started is Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert. I haven't gotten very far into the book--it tends to be a little bit of a slow read even though it is captivating. From what I've read so far, I have to agree with one of Amazon's editor's description: In Madame Bovary Flaubert never allows anything to go on too long; he can suggest years of boredom in a paragraph, capture the essence of a character in a single conversational exchange, or show us the gulf between his soulful heroine and her dull-witted husband in a sentence (and one that, moreover, presages all Emma's later experience of men).
So, I guess what makes a well-written book is when you know the author has chosen each and every word carefully to get across his/her point across. I suppose that's what makes the classics the classics--they're not only well-written but tell great stories and develop characters that stick in one's mind. I hope one day I can be as meticulous about the words I choose to write as some of the great ones out there!
But, it got me thinking. Am I being too critical? What is it exactly that makes me say "It's just not that well written." I am not by any means a great writer myself so what expertise am I basing this criticism on? Does a book have to be well written for it to be enjoyable? I know many people who read romance novels just for the hell of it--and I don't know that either of the above-mentioned books are particularly "well-written" but they tell great stories. So, is reading anything a good thing or just reading quality books? Well, contrary to popular belief, I don't have all the answers.
However, one of my new year's resolutions was to read some of the classics. The one that I've started is Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert. I haven't gotten very far into the book--it tends to be a little bit of a slow read even though it is captivating. From what I've read so far, I have to agree with one of Amazon's editor's description: In Madame Bovary Flaubert never allows anything to go on too long; he can suggest years of boredom in a paragraph, capture the essence of a character in a single conversational exchange, or show us the gulf between his soulful heroine and her dull-witted husband in a sentence (and one that, moreover, presages all Emma's later experience of men).
So, I guess what makes a well-written book is when you know the author has chosen each and every word carefully to get across his/her point across. I suppose that's what makes the classics the classics--they're not only well-written but tell great stories and develop characters that stick in one's mind. I hope one day I can be as meticulous about the words I choose to write as some of the great ones out there!
Monday, January 17, 2005
Happy New Year
So, we're well into 2005 and my new year's greetings are a bit delayed. The last few months have been busy...Here's a quick rundown of what's kept me busy:
a part-time job at Crate & Barrel, where using my awesome discount, i collected some nice serving platters; hosted a tree-trimming party for my 6' tree, using the awesome platters; a dear friend visit from Iraq; a fun wedding in Chinatown where I met a boy who took me on a date, explained to me why he wasn't going to pay & then went in for a kiss (i think he read the wrong book on what to do on a date); the C&B holiday party in the ballroom at the Union Station, for which I got to dress up and where I danced with the CEO to Michael Jackson's PYT; went on another date where I had fun but the next day got a poem from the boy about how I've changed his world and realized that I want to be in an even exchange relationship; had Thanksgiving w/a wonderful friend who went all out with the turkey and all the trimmings; got sick, got better; celebrated Eid w/family, celebrated Xmas Eve & Xmas with family and friends in-town and from out-of-town and finally closed out the year with a bang of a New Year's party.
And now it's 2005. This year I didn't make any major resolutions. I think I'm going to attempt to read the classics, find a way to give back, to be more creative and to be a better family member (sister, aunt, daughter) & friend. Here's to the New Year!
a part-time job at Crate & Barrel, where using my awesome discount, i collected some nice serving platters; hosted a tree-trimming party for my 6' tree, using the awesome platters; a dear friend visit from Iraq; a fun wedding in Chinatown where I met a boy who took me on a date, explained to me why he wasn't going to pay & then went in for a kiss (i think he read the wrong book on what to do on a date); the C&B holiday party in the ballroom at the Union Station, for which I got to dress up and where I danced with the CEO to Michael Jackson's PYT; went on another date where I had fun but the next day got a poem from the boy about how I've changed his world and realized that I want to be in an even exchange relationship; had Thanksgiving w/a wonderful friend who went all out with the turkey and all the trimmings; got sick, got better; celebrated Eid w/family, celebrated Xmas Eve & Xmas with family and friends in-town and from out-of-town and finally closed out the year with a bang of a New Year's party.
And now it's 2005. This year I didn't make any major resolutions. I think I'm going to attempt to read the classics, find a way to give back, to be more creative and to be a better family member (sister, aunt, daughter) & friend. Here's to the New Year!
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
Virtual dating
Well, after my last wonderful date (remember the jacking-off incident?) I took a break from the online dating thing. But I decided to get back into the game. So, I've been searching for Mr. Wonderful. Apparently they don't just land in your living room while you're sitting around watching t.v. They say you've got to do a little work. I'm on 3 different online dating sites. I decided to compile some lists to make my search a little more interesting. Here we go.
Two of the sites requires you to have an opening line.
"I am man." I should hope so if you're coming up in my search for "males".
"Can you complete me?" Can you come up w/something more original?
"I totally rock!" Good for you?
"Any funny, fun, attractive, cool girls out here?" or "Anyone fun and interesting out there?" Nope, the world's a boring, unattractive world full of boring, depressed, ugly, very uncool girls. Sorry to disappoint you--looks like you're going to be alone forever.
"Hello ladies..." Is it just me or do you immediately think of Joey from Friends? And, do you really want to be dating Joey? I don't know, maybe someone does.
"He cleans up nicely." So, all the other times he's what?
"Now what could be wrong with this face?" Do you really want me to answer that?
"Dancing w/myself." Great, keep doing that...it just sounds wrong.
"Let's spice up a life." Whose life? Can we really spice anyone's life? Okay!!
"I am looking for a women to make me happy." Grammar people!!
"Hello gals! I love women, women, women and I hope they love me." I don't even know what to say about that one...
All the sites ask you to describe yourself. I found that every single guy loves to bike, travel, work out, is in excellent shape, is really funny, loves to laugh (thank goodness!) ... Wow! What a fit, healthy, happy world we live in. And I thought it was going to be hard to find a great guy. Silly me. Here's one I immediately wanted to respond to "I'm earning my master's of fine arts in film and my schedule is booked up rather air tight." Great! I've been looking for someone who has no time for me. My favorites are teh ones who tell you they're looking for a girlfriend, but give you no information about themselves. What do I have to go on to show any interest????
I sound horribly bitter, I know. But I just don't understand why the world can't be as perfect as I am. (Umm, yes, that's a joke. And, yes, you can stop laughing now...it wasn't that funny was it?) So in an attempt to sound a little more positive...
Here are some of favorites that made me "smile" or "wink" at them.
Username: Naughty_artist --I just couldn't resist.
Opening lines:
"That's me on the left, solving world hunger...AGAIN!"
"Rich doctor seeking arm candy."
"Something in the way she moves me."
"STOP! Click here for a good laugh with a great guy." Then it opens, "Well it made you stop didn't it?" It did. He sounded cute.
Username: "Partly Sunny"; Opening line: "Partly cloudy" --how cute is that?
Two of the sites requires you to have an opening line.
"I am man." I should hope so if you're coming up in my search for "males".
"Can you complete me?" Can you come up w/something more original?
"I totally rock!" Good for you?
"Any funny, fun, attractive, cool girls out here?" or "Anyone fun and interesting out there?" Nope, the world's a boring, unattractive world full of boring, depressed, ugly, very uncool girls. Sorry to disappoint you--looks like you're going to be alone forever.
"Hello ladies..." Is it just me or do you immediately think of Joey from Friends? And, do you really want to be dating Joey? I don't know, maybe someone does.
"He cleans up nicely." So, all the other times he's what?
"Now what could be wrong with this face?" Do you really want me to answer that?
"Dancing w/myself." Great, keep doing that...it just sounds wrong.
"Let's spice up a life." Whose life? Can we really spice anyone's life? Okay!!
"I am looking for a women to make me happy." Grammar people!!
"Hello gals! I love women, women, women and I hope they love me." I don't even know what to say about that one...
All the sites ask you to describe yourself. I found that every single guy loves to bike, travel, work out, is in excellent shape, is really funny, loves to laugh (thank goodness!) ... Wow! What a fit, healthy, happy world we live in. And I thought it was going to be hard to find a great guy. Silly me. Here's one I immediately wanted to respond to "I'm earning my master's of fine arts in film and my schedule is booked up rather air tight." Great! I've been looking for someone who has no time for me. My favorites are teh ones who tell you they're looking for a girlfriend, but give you no information about themselves. What do I have to go on to show any interest????
I sound horribly bitter, I know. But I just don't understand why the world can't be as perfect as I am. (Umm, yes, that's a joke. And, yes, you can stop laughing now...it wasn't that funny was it?) So in an attempt to sound a little more positive...
Here are some of favorites that made me "smile" or "wink" at them.
Username: Naughty_artist --I just couldn't resist.
Opening lines:
"That's me on the left, solving world hunger...AGAIN!"
"Rich doctor seeking arm candy."
"Something in the way she moves me."
"STOP! Click here for a good laugh with a great guy." Then it opens, "Well it made you stop didn't it?" It did. He sounded cute.
Username: "Partly Sunny"; Opening line: "Partly cloudy" --how cute is that?
Wednesday, October 13, 2004
The God of Small Things
That title of a book sticks in my mind and pops up occassionally. Like today.
The small things: finishing a book, not having to run to catch the Metra and a happy shuttle bus driver
Last night I finished an incredible book called the Kite Runner by Khalid Hosseini. This is an incredible book. It's a coming-of-age story about two boys in Afghanistan. It's a moving story that reveals an Afghanistan that I wasn't too familiar with but was. If you need something to read--read this. I could not put the book down and finished it in 3 days. And then I dreamt about the characters. That's when you know a book's made an impression on you--when you start dreaming about the characters as if they are real people in your life.
All week I've been riding the Metra 'cos I'm having car issues. Most days (as Jewell will atest to) I have to run to catch the Metra 'cos I'm always running late. I didn't have to do that today. Yippee. Once I got to my destination (the Lake Bluff stop) and onto my shuttle bus to get to work, I found a very happy shuttle bus driver. Here is this man whose job is to drive people from the train station to Abbott Park (my place of employment) and maybe to drive people in-between buildings around the Abbott campus. That's it folks. He sits behind the wheel of this shuttle bus day after day driving around people. But, I tell you, he could not be happier doing it. I got on the bus to find "Mellow Yellow" by Donovan blasting on the radio and a very happy driver greeting each and everyone of us with a smile and "Good Morning! Great to see you! Welcome aboard!" The only other person who made such an impression on me was the toll booth collector whom I haven't seen in years. He was such a happy person collecting toll. Their happiness puts my life in perspective for me.
It's really all about the small things and a good attitude. On that note, here's to a happy Wednesday! (At least until I take my car to the mechanic and he tells me what the damage will be.)
The small things: finishing a book, not having to run to catch the Metra and a happy shuttle bus driver
Last night I finished an incredible book called the Kite Runner by Khalid Hosseini. This is an incredible book. It's a coming-of-age story about two boys in Afghanistan. It's a moving story that reveals an Afghanistan that I wasn't too familiar with but was. If you need something to read--read this. I could not put the book down and finished it in 3 days. And then I dreamt about the characters. That's when you know a book's made an impression on you--when you start dreaming about the characters as if they are real people in your life.
All week I've been riding the Metra 'cos I'm having car issues. Most days (as Jewell will atest to) I have to run to catch the Metra 'cos I'm always running late. I didn't have to do that today. Yippee. Once I got to my destination (the Lake Bluff stop) and onto my shuttle bus to get to work, I found a very happy shuttle bus driver. Here is this man whose job is to drive people from the train station to Abbott Park (my place of employment) and maybe to drive people in-between buildings around the Abbott campus. That's it folks. He sits behind the wheel of this shuttle bus day after day driving around people. But, I tell you, he could not be happier doing it. I got on the bus to find "Mellow Yellow" by Donovan blasting on the radio and a very happy driver greeting each and everyone of us with a smile and "Good Morning! Great to see you! Welcome aboard!" The only other person who made such an impression on me was the toll booth collector whom I haven't seen in years. He was such a happy person collecting toll. Their happiness puts my life in perspective for me.
It's really all about the small things and a good attitude. On that note, here's to a happy Wednesday! (At least until I take my car to the mechanic and he tells me what the damage will be.)
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Boys, boys, boys
Will they ever learn? Being single and dating is always so much fun...and interesting. As a result of my last date, and subsequent conversations w/my girlfriends, I thought I'd help out some single boys/men and point out some don'ts of 1st, 2nd, 3rd or really any dates (unless there is mutual agreement--mutual means she would like this behavior as much as you!).
- Do not order for your date--yes, we are in 2004 and we are quite capable of ordering for ourselves.
- If you invite her to dinner, let her eat dinner (that means an entree).
- No matter how excited you are, do not jack-off on your date's bed when you're on a 2nd date. Or really, any date. Take it home, honey 'cos honestly, it's no turn on for us.
- Do not rip off your date (i.e. don't pocket the change that's hers, etc.).
- No matter what a great "rack" she has, "you have a nice set there" is not a compliment. Neither are "I'd like to get my hands on those" or "Damn, what size are you?"
- Do not tell your date you got a "hard-on" standing behind her at a show. Again, not a turn for us and it won't get you anywhere fast.
- Do not hop in the first cab that comes your way and say see ya, leaving her waiting for the next cab. I don't care if you lost the game of pool or darts.
- Do not leave her waiting for a bus alone in a bad neighborhood. I don't care if you don't have a car, be courteous enough to make sure she gets on the bus.
- No matter how beautiful your date's lips are, it's not okay to tell her she has great lips for a blow-job. Again, not a compliment.
- Do not talk about the only girlfriend you had--back in highschool, who left you with a broken heart that's left you not trusting women. Actually, go ahead and talk about it. It'll give us a chance to get rid of you faster and neither of us will have wasted any time.
- Don't chew with your mouth open, or allow food to fly out of your mouth. Actually, this is a general tip--remember this whenever you're eating in other's company.
Thursday, September 30, 2004
Gettin' hitched N'awlins style
No, no, I did not get married. But my cousin did. I was down there last week for the happy event. Nasreen & Rob got hitched, and they did in style! Nasreen looked absolutely gorgeous, of course. And Rob could not have looked happier. After the ceremony, the two surprised us (and the rest of the wedding guests) by leading us (along with a jazz band!) on a parade through the streets of the French Quarters. Everyone came out--from bars, restaurants, apartments, stores--to watch as we waved our white handkerchiefs and danced to the jazz through the streets. It was so much fun! People were snapping pictures & whisteling & congratulating the newlyweds.
The getaway to New Orleans gave me a chance to reconnect w/my sis & her girls. It was a great girls weekend! We shopped, watched movies, drank (well me & my sis anyway and I did and said things that I don't recall, made phone calls I vaguely remember--all on the good ol' Bourbon Street where you can buy huge ass beers, tasty drinks in tall green things all from a little window and hang around the street enjoying it), shopped some more, went for a dip on the rooftop, and managed to get in a little historic sightseeing too!
The getaway to New Orleans gave me a chance to reconnect w/my sis & her girls. It was a great girls weekend! We shopped, watched movies, drank (well me & my sis anyway and I did and said things that I don't recall, made phone calls I vaguely remember--all on the good ol' Bourbon Street where you can buy huge ass beers, tasty drinks in tall green things all from a little window and hang around the street enjoying it), shopped some more, went for a dip on the rooftop, and managed to get in a little historic sightseeing too!
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Creativity
I am craving creativity like some people crave chocolate. I need an outlet. I'm finding that I'm more & more attracted to creative types. "She fell in love with a drummer, another & another". I'm sorta into drummer boys right now. Well, one in particular. But it's unclear if he's into me--considering we've never met. No, despite the chosen lyric, I'm not in love w/someone I haven't met yet. Any suggestions on creative outlets? I'm open to just about anything...
This weekend I had some pre-wedding celebrations--a bachelorette party, a bridal shower. Sandwiched in between was a speed-dating event for Muslims, organized (or not so much, I should say) by an aunty. Obviously so, much to my dismay--there were too many moments when we were sitting there waiting for boys to come around. The most interesting thing about it were the spectators. Did you know speed-dating is now considered a spectator sport? We had parents watching, seeing who their beloved child paid attention to and who they thought should have paid attention to. As if the whole process wasn't uncomfortable enough. I got to meet about 24 guys and I learned all of their names, their occupation, their city of residence and that's about it, before the bell rang and they moved on to the next table of anxiously awaiting women. I remember one--and that only his career and city. I met some nice women--the ones that were sitting w/me at the table. I did not succeed in finding my $50 husband, much to my parents' dismay. Sorry mom & dad. The search continues.
This weekend I had some pre-wedding celebrations--a bachelorette party, a bridal shower. Sandwiched in between was a speed-dating event for Muslims, organized (or not so much, I should say) by an aunty. Obviously so, much to my dismay--there were too many moments when we were sitting there waiting for boys to come around. The most interesting thing about it were the spectators. Did you know speed-dating is now considered a spectator sport? We had parents watching, seeing who their beloved child paid attention to and who they thought should have paid attention to. As if the whole process wasn't uncomfortable enough. I got to meet about 24 guys and I learned all of their names, their occupation, their city of residence and that's about it, before the bell rang and they moved on to the next table of anxiously awaiting women. I remember one--and that only his career and city. I met some nice women--the ones that were sitting w/me at the table. I did not succeed in finding my $50 husband, much to my parents' dismay. Sorry mom & dad. The search continues.
Friday, September 03, 2004
Where did the summer go?
I only started this blog thingy a month ago. At first I thought, who really cares what I have to say? I posed this question to a friend who said it doesn't matter--I do it for myself. I like that. My summer flew by--where did it go? It went to many, many street festivals, Sunday afternoons w/friends, to Texas for a wedding, to Indiana, to an outdoor film fest, a random hookup w/an ex (fun times?), to hanging w/a new baby niece, to a day spent with my favorite girl visiting from Iraq, to enjoying very happy times w/a friend right before she moved to NYC--here's hoping she's found her ladies who lunch, to drinks w/friends, to Spiderman 2, the Village, 24 hours of 24 (y'know the show w/Kiefer) sitting on the edge of my seat, to expensive car repairs, to dinner w/close friends, to a 5k walk for battered women, getting to know new friends, to the Millenium Park, and to serial dating online.
I was troubled by the fact that I've turned to this medium as an option for meeting people. But a wise girl told me, "it doesn't matter how you meet, just that you meet". So, I went on a few dates. One was bad, one was okay and one was great. But none of them went anywhere. As my 12-yr-old nieces told me on some pajamas--boys are stupid, throw rocks at them. Hope I don't hit anyone too hard in the head.
I want an extension on summer--I'm not done w/my love affair with it. Or with the city--that's for my bad date.
I was troubled by the fact that I've turned to this medium as an option for meeting people. But a wise girl told me, "it doesn't matter how you meet, just that you meet". So, I went on a few dates. One was bad, one was okay and one was great. But none of them went anywhere. As my 12-yr-old nieces told me on some pajamas--boys are stupid, throw rocks at them. Hope I don't hit anyone too hard in the head.
I want an extension on summer--I'm not done w/my love affair with it. Or with the city--that's for my bad date.
Monday, August 02, 2004
Lost in Michigan
Was it the translation of the directions? Perhaps! I went to Indiana to see my friend Jamie who was visiting the family cottage in Indy from Canada w/daughter Audra. Getting there was a joy--a 3 hour trip took me about 4.5 hrs as I wandered aimlessly through Michigan. It was an incredible wknd w/J & her v. kind family. As always J had words of wisdom (or confessions) to share with me. I learned that until you have a baby you would never know you could love anyone so much. It's all the love you have for everyone combined into one. I was happy to hear this 'cos as of late I've been wondering if I could love my child (when & if I have one) as much as I love other people in my life. I was also inspired to do something more meaningful with my life. Clinical data management is interesting and challenging for bringing home a paycheck, but what is my passion? What in this world really matters to me that I can contribute to? breast cancer? maybe. Maybe I can take a pet peeve and turn into a contribution to the world.
I finally got a chance to talk to my best girl who is doing big things in Iraq. I'm so proud of you girlie! You're making your mark on many people's lives! She also always has wise things to say and she too reminded me the importance of giving back to the world by doing something meaningful. Off I go to find meaningful things to do!
I finally got a chance to talk to my best girl who is doing big things in Iraq. I'm so proud of you girlie! You're making your mark on many people's lives! She also always has wise things to say and she too reminded me the importance of giving back to the world by doing something meaningful. Off I go to find meaningful things to do!
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